Sharing A Postpartum Depression Journey
I struggled in silence because I didn’t want anyone to think of me differently.
When I had our oldest son I was finishing school. My husband was joining the military and left for basic when he was 2 months old. I had a pretty normal bond with our oldest and I loved every minute of it. It wasn’t until I had our middle that I struggled with postpartum.
I isolated myself
I isolated myself and was terrified to leave him with anyone even my husband because in my mind something bad would happen if he wasn’t with me 24/7. I hardly slept and felt guilty for even trying to do anything for myself.
When our youngest was born it intensified I wanted to be done breastfeeding but I nursed my other two and I would feel guilty if didn’t with him. I was having suicidal thoughts because my children deserve someone better than me as a mother.
He has been my biggest supporter
I struggled in silence because I didn’t want anyone to think of me differently. My husband always asked if I was okay but I always said I was. He walked in on me having an anxiety attack and he instantly dropped to his knees and just held me in silence. Since then he encourages me to speak openly and he just listens and he also encouraged me to seek help. He has been my biggest supporter when it comes to my mental health and I honestly wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for him.